It's funny how sometimes the ruminating thoughts from the past, or hidden desires and dreams in my heart seem SO BIG and IMPORTANT at first.  Then God says, "Your gaze is slipping from me. You seem to be awfully enamored by that little worthless shiny little golden thing you carry so close to your heart."  So with a very loving heart for His daughter, and with His best intentions for me in mind, He begins the purifying process.  So along comes the blazing fire and the cranked up heat, until that little "thing" pretty much gets melted down to no-thing.  It loses it sheen, and there isn't much left to even want it anymore.  Then God brings in the big chisel and starts to hammer away at my heart, chipping away all the wrong motives, fears, expectations around that "thing".  Then He shovels away all the debris, and blows away all the dust. Then I finally see the "thing" for what it is - it's nothing compared to God at all.  Then the funny thing is, He says "Here you go. You can have it back now."  The shiny objects in life can be so many things - little wounds I nurse, unforgiveness I hold onto, or just the things I think God wants me to do that just become too important. He's jealous for my full affection, and it's so much better to keep a constant gaze on Him.  To behold is to become!  The more I behold His beauty, His love, His goodness, His ways, the less I look to other "things" (even good things) to satisfy me, and the more I know I am becoming like Him.  All that glitters isn't gold - and even if it were, it would pale in comparison to the beautiful and wonder of my God.

Here's my attempt at poetry writing a couple of months back.  It was inspired by The Chronicles of Narnia and Joe S' message on the riches found in scripture and using our redeemed imaginations.

MIND'S EYE

Ready or not, it’s just another day when the world seems to run after me

In the frantic pace of life, its okay, for my heart chooses to turn and flee

There are many doors that I could open and find a place to hide

But there is only one place where I feel safe inside

The wardrobe door is always ajar

And a sweet voice is calling out to my heart

Its says, “Come away, come afar”

It’s a quiet place, a secret space, a lonely place apart

I leave this world behind and dare to enter in

As I search to know my Savior, my Father, my King

I become so fascinated and awed by what I see

That time stands still as His glory changes me

I look again, and find the lion, and the worthy lamb

And I gaze upon the beauty of the Great I Am

My heart swells so much that it begins to break

But only to grow back larger for more of Him to take

As we sit, and sup and fellowship together

I experience the purest form of love and friendship ever

Never have I known such a deep intimacy

Now that I’ve tasted, nothing else can satisfy me

I let me mind and heart wander to holy places

I think about His goodness, His love, and His graces

I meditate on His words – the truth that sets me free

I remember just how much He has done for me

Whatever is pure, true, right, noble, and lovely

And whatever is good, excellent and praiseworthy

I will think upon such things,

For His delights are my delights and peace does it bring

With sanctified imagination, I am free to wonder,

To dream, to marvel, to be in awe of all of His great treasures

I can paint more than a thousand pictures, and though they’ll all fall short

I’ll have come a little closer in knowing Him more

How far can my mind’s eye see?

I must think with child-like faith, not ashamed again to dream

No thought too foolish, no limits to wondering just how grand is God’s reality

I must believe

I can imagine the creator speaking forth His masterpiece

I can observe from the shoreline the parting of the Red Sea

I can smell the fragrant incense poured over Jesus’ feet

I can cry as I ponder my savior’s death for me

The hope in my heart will never cease

Though the face of Jesus I have never really seen

I wait for the glorious day with full certainty

And know it will become my eternal reality.